The History of
Xena: Warrior Princess

Episode Name: Armageddon Now, Part I

Note: This is taken from a spoiler posted to Usenet by Michael Martinez.

We start out with the funeral of Hope and Solan in the village of Centaurs and Men near the Ixion Caverns. Hope's ashes rise up and float away, eventually raining down in a village or town. As the people try to figure out what the ash rain is all about Hope takes shape in front of an old wino. She kills him by the sucking the life out of him and her body reforms a little better (ala "Hellraiser" where Frank becomes more human with each kill).

Hope takes the dead man's cloak and returns to the cave where Xena has imprisoned Callisto. Hope frees Callisto but Callisto wants nothing to do with Dahok's plans. Hope argues with Callisto and promises her that she'll end Callisto's pain, wipe the slate clean. When Callisto becomes interested in Hope's offer, Hope tells her they have to kill Hercules ("this world's greatest hero").

We come back from the opening credits and commercial to find Hercules building the never-finished wall for Alcmene (IIRC, he has been working on this wall since the first season of H:TLJ). As Herc and Iolaus joke about how long it takes to build a wall correctly, Alcmene comes up and says a messenger has arrived with word for Hercules. King Tederius (?) is about to start a war because his daughter has run off and gotten married. Hercules is reluctant to help until Alcmene tells him the king is making sacrifices to Ares.

So Hercules and Iolaus go to find the king at Ares' temple. Ares is there showing the king all the great weapons Hephaestus has made for him and the god talks Tederius (?) into waging his war. Strife is hanging around making expressions (ala Gilligan during one of the typical Skipper-Professor debates) and stupid comments. When Hercules and Iolaus show up Hercules sends the king out of the temple with Iolaus. He then brings part of the temple down on Ares' weapons (ala Samson in the arena of the Philistines).

Ares goes berserk and attacks Hercules, who knocks him back. Ares sics Strife on Hercules, who beats the stuffing out of Strife. Hercules then takes off and Ares walks across Strife (saying, "Get up and act like a god, you worm.") As Ares sulks Strife mentions how it's too bad that Zeus has forbidden gods to kill gods (or half-gods, by implication). Callisto shows up and eggs Ares on. While Strife whines about Callisto ("Don't trust her! She's not one of us!") Ares and Callisto engage in some steamy innuendo while Callisto manipulates him into agreeing to help her. Every now and then, Ares or Callisto knocks Strife down or blasts him with fire or raw energy. Strife pretty much takes it on the chin for about five minutes.

Ares and Callisto take off and appear in the courtyard where Zeus had opened a gateway to the Sovereign's world in "Stranger In A Strange World". They reopen the gateway and bring the Sovereign out. Ares takes the amulet with Hind's blood away from the Sovereign and then he and Callisto take off. The Sovereign rages for a minute and then realizes he isn't in his own world. He stalks off. Ares and Callisto, back in the temple, engage in more innuendo and beating up on Strife.

Hercules and Iolaus convince the king that he should be throwing a wedding feast for his daughter and new son-in-law (who happens to be a prince, but "not good enough for her"). The heroes wander off and stop to eat in a village where a man comes up and asks Hercules not to beat him up. After the man describes how he had "seen" Hercules dressed while he "ripped up Arcadia", Hercules and Iolaus realize the Sovereign has escaped his prison. They run off to find him terrorizing another town. Hercules makes a dust bomb with Narcolepsis dust and distracts the Sovereign while Iolaus sneaks up on him.

Hercules and the Sovereign exchange blows, knocking each other away with typical Herkulean strength. Hercules gets up, says, "Now, Iolaus", and Iolaus drops the bomb on the Sovereign. They put the Sovereign to sleep and take him back to the courtyard n the temple with the gateway. Iolaus is a little groggy from having breathed some of the dust. While they discuss how to get the gate open, Ares and Callisto appear.

The two gods reopen the gate and Hercules sends the Sovereign back to the limbo between worlds, but Ares sends Hercules after him as well. The gate then closes and Ares and Callisto leave the courtyard, where Iolaus drops to his knees in disbelief. Ares and Callisto reappear in the temple and start fighting over the amulet with Hind's blood. Ares gains the upper hand and beats the stuffing out of Callisto, but then Hope appears and infuses Callisto with new power. She gets up and turns the tables on Ares, beating him down and taking the amulet from him.

Hercules and the Sovereign find themselves in a "world between worlds" from which there appears to be no escape. The Sovereign explains how he has tried to find a way out but cannot. So he decides to end his misery by killing Hercules (whose death will cause the Sovereign to die). They begin waging a futile struggle (being evenly matched).

Iolaus has by now found a way into the temple and is watching as the gods quarrel among themselves. Ares then sends Strife against Callisto. Strife, seeing how Callisto is now in the dominant position, begins to placate her but Callisto covers a dagger with Hind's blood and kills Strife. Callisto goes to join Hope and they vanish. Iolaus comes out into the open and discovers that Strife is dead.

Ares grieves over Strife ("He tried hard; he just was in the wrong job"). Iolaus gets Ares to snap out of his grief and focus on the situation. They go after Hope and Callisto, but arrive only in time to see Hope send Callisto back in time (promising once again that she'll be free of her pain, able to live in peace, if she completes her mission). Ares confronts Hope but is taken back by the horror of her appearance.

When Ares tells Iolaus that Hope has sent Callisto back in time, Iolaus realizes that she must be going to kill Alcmene before Hercules can be born. He convinces Ares to send him back (Ares cannot go because he has to stay and hold things together). Ares tells Iolaus that he can only follow where Callisto goes and then can only return to the immediate present (he doesn't say, "That's the rules", but it's heavily implied -- this is the line the Olynpians always use when they impose conditions on whatever they do for Hercules and Iolaus).

In the limbo world Hercules and the Sovereign finally tire out and the Sovereign realize it's pointless for them to fight. While Hercules carries on about how there must be a way to escape, the Sovereign mentions that he could watch Hercules in his own world. There is a fountain or water basin which acts like a magic mirror (ala "Beauty and the Beast" and "Snow White" or Galadriel's mirror in THE LORD OF THE RINGS) which shows you whatever you think of. As Hercules looks into the water he thinks of Iolaus and sees him running through the countryside. When Herc tries to reach out to Iolaus the image fades away. ("I told you so!" the Sovereign claims.)

Iolaus finds himself in Corinth (so much for Thebes being Hercules' home, unless Alcmene is supposed to relocate). He learns that Amphitryon is already dead and that Alcmene is heavy with child. The women of Corinth don't think much of her because of her pregnancy. Iolaus runs to her house and introduces himself to Alcmene, begging her to come with him. Alcmene, grieving over Amphitryon's grave, is upset and frightened so she starts to go back to her house. Callisto comes up and unleashes a torrent of flames toward Alcmene as Iolaus screams out and tries to intervene.

To be continued....